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Saturday, January 22, 2011

Clumsy Goes Viral

All of these are texts back and forth from hubby and I over the last few days. Well, I emailed. He texted.

***

ME: Subject: Oh My God.

The toddler is trying to kill herself.

In 15 minutes she

-tried to dive head first to the floor between the couch and the chair. Slammed her chest on the couch. I barely caught her before she smashed her head into the floor.

-fell getting out of the tub, scary fall

-tripped over my foot and fell AGAIN.

She's in tears.

HUBBY: I will get her a helmet.

***

ME: Subject: OMG

She just fell down the stairs big time. Drew blood!!!! Her face is all scraped up. :( Just when I was thinking we could quit PT!

HUBBY: What are you doing to my girl????

***

ME: Subject: How's work?

We are getting ready for ballet.

I am joining the boo-boo club. Tripped over the laundry basket. At first blush looks like a bruise of about 6" in length.

HUBBY: I kicked the vacuum last night.

ME: I just rammed the love seat into my big toe because I had to move it because the toddler threw my slippers back behind it. That one made me cry.

My ankle is swollen like 1/2 a baseball right now.

I walked laps while she was at dance class and did over a mile, giving myself blisters in the process. On both feet. I guess these boots were not made for walking.

***

So who wins? I'm pretty sure the hubby loses. Kicking the vacuum is nothing compared to what the toddler and I have done to ourselves. I think I win going by volume and time (I did myself in before noon), but the toddler wins with the sympathy vote. Also, her scraped nostril is pretty bad, she can't go to swimming class today as it's an open wound. She looks like we let her do UFC Cage Fights without a ref.

Our black lab, who is sweet as the day is long, now follows me around anxiously trying to lick my ankle. Hubby says it's because of the blood pooled under my skin. I say dogs can too have empathy.

3 comments:

  1. Empathy, definitely empathy.

    It might just be me, but I think until some of her cage fighting battle scars abate, you might be tempted to keep her confined to the house ;-)

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  2. I need to wrap her in bubble wrap and then find us both a big big bubble to live in. We are far too klutzy.

    I think it's a tall thing. I was a mess when I was growing. Tripping over nothing, constantly falling. I fell down the stairs too a lot as a kid, broke my ankle once even.

    The toddler is growing so she's in trouble.

    Now I'm klutzy possibly from the adrenal stuff. It's been much much worse this year and constant and I've hear other patients note the same issues.

    M

    M

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tell the dog to lick the toddler's face - there's some healing enzyme thingy in dog spit. Really.
    Sorry you're all owie'd - Tracy2

    ReplyDelete

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