Had those 5 cavities filled today. Shoulda updosed. Face planted into bed the second I got home. My head hurts.
So two days good and now two days bad.
Maybe I should do that blood work after all.
But I keep thinking, I'm on a subphysiologic dose, I should be fiiiine, right? But this isn't steroid withdrawal either. So WTF?
So the dogs, which are much more entertaining than me. First the yellow lab unplugged the freezer with his butt. We all remember this, right?
Then the hubby put all the defrosted meat garbage (some of it was too far gone to save) in a place where the dogs could get it.
I told him to move the garbage.
He did not.
So the dogs got into it.
Duh.
Next day, the yellow lab is horking up balls of aluminum foil on the dining room carpet.
Doh.
Tell hubby to move garbage again.
He doesn't. Because why? I don't know. It's some male genetic malfunction.
Dogs therefore obliterate a bag of mowed grass.
Turns out, they don't like grass. Not like that. So they just spread it around and look at me like 'bitch please' as if I screwed up their food order.
Then they tore into another bag because the hubby lets them loose in the yard with the garbage.
By this point, the hubby sees the light and moves the damn garbage bags.
Finally.
But he makes a mistake. He thinks he moved all the garbage and left the recycling in place (which the dogs won't touch).
Except he moved the recycling and left the garbage.
So for the third time in the same day, the dogs are in the garbage.
We finally broke out the hydrogen peroxide and mixed it with chicken broth to make them puke it up.
Moral of the story? We are bad with garbage. Also, dogs will eat aluminum foil if it contains enough rotting meat, who knew?
Why didn't I just move the garbage? I kept thinking the hubby took care of it, only to find out, after the fact, that no, it had not been moved.
The bag of grass was on me, but they had to pick at it through a fence. I thought it was safe. I was wrong. Next time? I will move it all myself, cramping muscles and all.
Oh, the dogs are fine. Feeling a bit betrayed by that tricksy chicken broth, but fine.
I hope this was entertaining. Not sure if my energy is good enough to do the story justice. The stupidity was painfully funny to me.
Diagnostic Tests to Reassure Patients
5 days ago
Yes, this story is funny!
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