Now I Know

Thursday was a great day, except for the fact that I overdid it in the pool. Friday and Saturday I was in sad zombie shuffle mode with ever decreasing functionality.

By Saturday night, it became clear I had, in fact, caught the hubby's cold.

Which I kind of suspected. Being tired with increasing fatigue that erodes my ability to keep up with the basics of daily life is not normal even if I did over do it that one day. (And technically it's not so much that I over did it, it's that my body can't hack coming down with a cold and floating in a pool at the same time.)

It's a mild bug (I assume, based on the hubby's interaction with it) so I expect this will pass without too much drama.

Just to keep things interesting, however, my blood pressure is no longer controlled. Probably due to the licorice. Or being sick, I've had some zig-zags that make me think the adrenals are doing more than just making me tired. Either way, it needs attention.

I'm not stress dosing because I can sit on my ass all day today and don't have to be anywhere. I plan to do the same tomorrow. This cold should pass by then (I hope) and allow me to move on.

I am convinced that the key is going to be BHRT and if I can't stay off steroids, that won't happen.

If the asthma gets worse or the adrenal GI stuff starts up, it will change the game, but, for now, I'm trying to just hold on to the status quo.

Wish me luck, because, apparently, I don't have any.

Acceleration

Last week after I did so poorly despite alternative medicine's "best treatment" I freaked. Things like "I'm never going to get better" were uttered.

So I contacted Dr. Alternative and begged for hormones.

Which were originally on the agenda for next month.

Today I had another office visit as a result of my begging and here's the scoop...

1. They looked at the chemistry and I may be on to something with the 'low progesterone is bad for cortisol levels' thing, but I need to be steroid free before they'll do any bio-identical hormone replacement therapy (BHRT).

For at least a week.

Which, I'm almost there.

Possible confounding factor: The hubby and the toddler are sick. If the hubby is sick, that's bad because he never gets sick. When's he's got a bug, I have about 90% odds of getting it too. So I'm all up in arms and running in circles like a chicken looking for its head over here.

2. I also need to rest more and to not tax my system so much. Sounds great, but I'm not sure how that's going to happen. I feel like I'm pretty slowed down to begin with and now I need to go even slower? Am I supposed to move in slow motion? Oh wait, that happens and it doesn't help.

My need for rest outpaces the number of hours in the day. It's insatiable. I'm not sure how I'm going to manage this, but I'll try.

Here's an anecdote that illustrates the edge my body keeps falling over: We went for a walk last night. A glorious, post-thunderstorm walk. Half way through, I heard an animal in the bushes in the same area where I was attacked by a dog while I was pregnant.

We never saw any animal, but I got all uptight, flashing back to the attack and feeling like some mean dog was going to come at me. (By the way, WHAT is with the animal theme lately?)

After that point, I kept having to stop and rest because I'd become too weak to walk continuously. That's how brittle my stress response is.

So I could take to my bed and do nothing and even that would not be enough. As I told Doctor Alternative, my body requires absolute perfection, anything less and it can't cope. This is the main problem. I can function, but nothing can go wrong and that's not real life.

I could go to bed, but if it catches on fire, I'm sol. (Don't laugh, that could happen. No, I don't smoke, you're just underestimating my karma. Don't do that lest it want to prove you wrong.)

I can't give my body what it needs. I'm not sure anything else can either.

3. Dr. Alternative increased the IV treatments to twice a week in an effort to accelerate whatever we can.