I Blinked

 

So I took prednisone.

It came down to grocery shopping. Well, that and work.

I needed to go to the store. Hubby would do it, but it's tough to outsource right now. Starting next week, the kiddo has some outside activities this year where she needs a lunch and I have no idea what we're doing for that food-wise, which means being in the stupid store and not dying of asthma while I'm there.

To be fair, I gave this thing miles upon miles of rope to sort itself out. I've had asthma for over almost two weeks. I kept thinking I'd get better and wouldn't need prednisone. In part because the trigger is a limited scope irritant that maybe I would grow accustomed to. 

I have really been optimistic here. Truly. It may not sound like it, but to hold off on prednisone this long...that's optimism. Misguided. But optimism nevertheless.

But I couldn't function. I'm not sure how well I've articulated it, but I've been a zombie this whole past however long. These posts and a few admin tasks for work are pretty much it. I haven't cooked. I haven't gardened. I couldn't carry a conversation. I've just sat and sat and sat, waiting, waiting, waiting to turn the corner. 

And then I ran out of time for this bullshit. There were things I needed to do, where I had to function, and it got to where I was reneging on some work things, so the runway ended. I extended it as long as I could.

Stupid APAP/CPAP. Stupid covid. Stupid everything.